Resources: Books, Articles, & Helpful Links
Caring for your health starts with caring for your mental health.
Resources For Betrayed Partners
Parent Resources
Resources For Trauma & Abuse
Other Great FREE Resources
A vital part of the recovery process from alcohol, pornorgraphy or drug addiction is understanding there is a problem. Then looking for support. At Counseling Alliance, we've provided a number of resources that are available to help you or your loved one get started on the healing path and lead a healthy life.
Betrayed Partners Resources
Below you will find helpful information about the impact of discovery on partners, as well as national options for treatment
Recommended Literature
BOOKS
Disclosing Secrets: When, to Whom and How Much to Reveal. Corely, D. & Schneider, J. (2012)
Facing Heartbreak: Steps for Recovery for Partners of Sex Addicts. Carnes, S., Lee, M., Rodriguez, A., (2012). Arizona: Gentle Path Press.
For Love and Money: Exploring Sexual & Financial Betrayal in Relationships. Debra Kaplan.
Intimate Deception: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Betrayal. Sherri Keffer.
Mending a Shattered Heart: A Guide for Partners of Sex Addicts. Carnes, Stefanie (2008). Arizona: Gentle Path Press.
Moving Beyond Betrayal: The 5 -step Boundary Solution for Partners of Sex Addicts. Tidwell, Palmer, V. (2016). Central Recovery Press.
Your Sexually Addicted Spouse : How Partner's Can Cope and Heal. Steffens, B., Means, M. (2009) New Jersey: New Horizon Press.
ARTICLES / BLOGS
https://bloomforwomen.com/courses/ Dr. Kevin Skinner and Addo Recovery two web sites that have a wealth of information for addiction in general and partner support in particular. It is well worth checking out! Watch Dr. Skinner’s TEDx Talk here.
3 Biggest Mistakes Betrayed Partners Make When Creating Boundaries. https://vickitidwellpalmer.com/3-biggest-mistakes-betrayed-partners-make-creating-boundaries/
btr.org. Betrayal Trauma Recovery provides free podcasts and educational resources and affordable daily, online group sessions in multiple time zones. Download the free BTR Checklist.
Formal Therapeutic Disclosure. https://vickitidwellpalmer.com/formal-therapeutic-disclosure/.
Gaslighting. You’re Not Going Crazy: You’re a Victim of Gaslighting. https://lonerwolf.com/gaslighting/
• COSA 12-STEP RECOVERY FOR PARTNERS OF SEX ADDICTS
• S-Anon 12-Step Recovery for Partners of Sex Addicts
• Infidelity Survivors Anonymous (ISA)
Below you will find helpful information about the impact of discovery on partners, as well as national options for treatment.
- Vicki Tidwell Palmer. Vicki Tidwell Palmer is a therapist and author of Moving Beyond Betrayal: The 5-Step Boundary Solution for Partners of Sex Addicts. Her website has helpful information and treatment options for partners. Her online courses are a great supplement to individual and group treatment options offered by Counseling Alliance therapists.
- https://addorecovery.com/ has two locations in Utah and one in Las Vegas. This site has many well-produced videos and articles with very helpful information. Time spent on their website is a good investment.
- https://bloomforwomen.com/ describes their site as one that provides "therapeutic online courses and a supportive community designed by clinical experts for women who want to heal from the trauma of infidelity, betrayal, harassment, or assault. We believe that healing is possible and that everything you need to take the next step is already inside you. We’re here to help you discover it."
- https://pathformen.com/ Path for Men is part of the Addo Network. The Addo Network's 4,000+ clients report that 99% felt safe and 96% were given tools to improve their circumstance.
- https://www.malepartnersoffemalesexaddicts.com/resources/. This site provides resources for males whose partners struggle with sex, porn, or love addiction.
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Counseling Alliance LLC is committed to providing a safe environment for children in a rapidly changing culture. Children are damaged in multiple ways is early exposure to pornography. Counseling Alliance LLC highly recommends Dr. Gail Dines and www.culturereframed.org as a resource for parents to become more aware of the damage early expose to porn causes.
https://parents.culturereframed.org/ has helpful information for parents of tweens. The Culture Reframed Parents Program is a complete, best-practice toolkit, which will help you raise porn-resilient kids. The Parents of Tweens Program is online, free, and accessible. Don’t wait another day!… The free course is highly recommended.
Children are involved in porn up to 10 times more than many parents believe.
Below you will find other helpful resources (Book Recommendations, Articles, Links to videos, and Websites) for parents as you prepare to have the important conversations with your children about Internet safety and pornography.
Recommended Parent Literature
- Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn Proofing Today's Young Kids is a resource to gently introduce young children to the dangers of the Internet
- NOT FOR KIDS! Not for Kids! is an exceptional children’s book that offers gentle and insightful guidance and is a must-have for parents and professionals to prepare kids under the age of 10 for the inevitable occasion when they will see explicit imagery. Who better to step them through this than loving and vigilant caregivers. Be sure to check out Liz Walker's website and her free ebook for parents, Parenting one click ahead of porn.
- How to Talk to Your Kids about Pornography reminds us that exposure to pornography is inevitable. Having the tools to talk with our children about Internet porn is key. Here is help for a tough conversation.
I just discovered my children have viewed porn. What do I do?
- Here's a great start. Pandora's Box Is Open Now What Do I Do? teaches parents the five-step C.L.O.S.E. plan to help their children become stronger than pornography's powerfully addictive pull.
- Hooked: The Brain Science About How Casual Sex Affects Human Development is an important book that helps equip parents to have conversations with their children about the dangers of casual sex. Hooked is about what’s happening to your brain when you’re having sex. With scientific data put in layman’s terms, this book demonstrates that:
- Sexual activity releases chemicals in the brain, creating emotional bonds between partners. This is great news for marriages!
- Once formed, however, breaking these bonds can have damaging effects on the brain such as depression and difficulty bonding with someone else in the future.
- The continual forming and breaking of these bonds can have permanent effects on a person’s brain.
Recommended Parent Video Resources
- https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/videos/ has so many videos it's at times hard to know where to begin in viewing. Take some time and explore the videos listed on this site.
Available Links & Other Resources
- https://www.covenanteyes.com/e-books/ Covenant Eyes has a long history of support for families in keeping their children safe. They have lots of free helpful information on their website. Check out the free ebooks section at the link above.
- http://enough.org/ Enough Is Enough® (EIE), a non-partisan, 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, emerged in 1994 as the national leader on the front lines of making the Internet safer for children and families. Since then, EIE has pioneered and led the effort to confront online pornography, child pornography, child stalking, and sexual predation with innovative initiatives and effective communications.
- https://internetsafety101.org/ More from Enough Is Enough®, this site provides a wealth of information about Internet safety. It's a great site to help parents stay current with what is happening nationally in the effort to protect our children.
- https://www.gcflearnfree.org/internetsafetyforkids/ In this free Internet Safety for Kids tutorial, learn Internet safety tips for keeping kids safe from online predators and cyberbullies.
- https://www.webwise.ie/ Webwise helps parents and teachers stay current with new technologies that impact all of our lives, including our children. Learn about new apps, free resources for parents, talking points for parents to facilitate discussion with children, and much more.
- Check out Reputation Defender for help in protecting your children against sexting. Be informed; sexting can have long-term, devastating impacts on your child, whether or not he or she is the one taking photos.
- LivingSafe.com has helpful information about what cyberbullying is and how to help protect your children from its impact.
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